some dreams live on in time forever
those dreams,you want with all your heart
and i will do whatever it takes
follow through with the promise i made
put it all on the line
what i hoped for at last would be mine
if i could reach,higher
just for one moment touch the sky
from that one moment in my life
i am gonna be stronger
know that i have tried my very best
i would put my spirit to the test
if i could reach
some days are meant to be remembered
those days we rise above the stars
so i will go the distance this time
seeing more the higher i climb
that the more i believe
all the more that this dream would be mine
"reach" by gloria estefan & diane warren
hitting the highnotes
a simple girl in a big big world
Seldom,very seldom does complete truth belong to any human disclosure; seldom can it happen that something is not a little disguised,or a little mistaken.
- Jane Austen, Emma
Talking much about oneself can also be a means to conceal oneself.
- Friedrich Nietzsche
sounding the rhythmof life
Tuesday, March 08, 2005
I almost committed suicide today.
Not a deliberate act though,I wouldn’t do something like that.
There’s a road across my place that I have to cross everyday to get home. It’s the kind of road whereby drivers speed all the way on both sides. While there’s a traffic light about 5metres away from the bus stop,it’s apparently invisible since everyone loves to jaywalk to get across. I try to make it a point to use the traffic lights as often as possible. Not because I’m a very law-abiding citizen or that I’m scared of crossing the road without someone holding my hand. Simply because I dislike stomping and killing all the grass at the divider. Okay,I’m weird but you get my point.
But I jaywalked today. And in a shocking manner too.
I crossed the road in front of a bus that was preparing to turn into the bus stop after my bus. It was the long bendy SMRT bus,so huge that I couldn’t see anything behind it. A vehicle could have easily attempted to overtake the bus and driven out onto the outer lane. It could just as easily have sped by and squashed me into a pancake right then and there.
I should have waited for the bus to drive off before crossing. Or why did I not use the traffic lights like I normally do? I don't know the answer myself. What was I thinking???
Or maybe I was thinking too much,thinking about report,thinking about assignments. So lost in thought that I seriously wasn’t even paying attention to what I was doing. It was only after I crossed the road that something jolted me out of my thoughts. Can’t describe the feeling,perhaps like an angel just plucked me from the road and dropped me at the divider,then left after giving me a hard knock on the head. Heart started racing when I thought of what I had done and walked the rest of the distance home on shaking knees.
So it’s not cliché but true that one second you could be alive and the next,POOF!!,you are gone. And yeah,so you wouldn’t be reading this entry now.
Accidents can really be quite freaky. I should know it well myself since I have covered so many accident cases before and it is really sad to report them. Attending wakes,talking to people who lost their loved ones,it could be a child or the sole breadwinner of the family. They would bring pictures out,tell you how nice the person was when he/she was living,how they went out happily that morning but never came back…
Guess I'm blessed in a way. Maybe God sent his angel down today so nothing happened to me.